I reject your reality, and substitute my own

Wow, the new game consoles have been unveiled, I got a new Centrino ThinkPad for work, and we got a new high pressure toilet at home!

* A concise yet profane summary of the saga from the “Transformers: The Movie” to “Prime Return”.
* Speaking of sci-fi classics, ever had a secret fantasy to play a Dalek? Exterminate!
* Speaking of extermination, you may want to peruse proposals on destroying a 4.5 billion-year-old, 6 million trillion-tonne ball of iron.

Plus: Who knew that a radioactive fuel core was so beautiful. I so want a traser now…

It worked for Magnums and malt liquor

McDonald’s will pay rappers dead presidents if they mention the Big Mac in their, er, “songs”. And, I’m assuming, they don’t sing “Back that ass up.

The one thing that surprised me was that there is an advertising firm (Maven Strategies) dedicated to getting gangsta thugs to name-drop as they bust rhymes.

I think Micky D’s should pay royalties to Rob Base and DJ EZ Rock for their shout-out in “It Takes Two”. After all, Base eloquently waxes: “I like the Whopper, fuck the Big Mac!

I was born with beta firmware

When a spider is born, it already knows how to spin a perfect, spiral web. Cats already know how to catch small fast-moving succulent critters, clean themselves vigorously, and act snooty.

It’s called instinct. But why don’t humans have any sophisticated pre-programmed instructions? We’re supposed to be the kings of the jungle! Even a stupid gazelle can walk within minutes of its birth. By its first hour, it’s already begging its parents for a cellphone.

Instead, for the first several years of our lives, we are only capable of extremely low-level tasks, such as complain loudly and pee on ourselves. Which is good if one is pursuing a career in professional sports, but not very useful for much else.

Michael Crichton in the novel Jurassic Park idly proposed that having more complex instincts uploaded into our foetal brains would only make our heads bigger, which would make giving birth more difficult. Which I hear is somewhat painful.

But maybe it’s like embedded electronics vs. full-fledged computing stations. Animals get their survival mojo all hard coded at birth, like CMOS chips. Therefore, they have a short list of preset instincts that can be run from stable, finely-optimized firmware in their heads.

Meanwhile, humans are given a blank slate, like a stick of RAM. We can be flexible with what we stick in our brains, and grow neural pathways to respond to challenges and situations as we encounter them. It means we end up being an illogical, forgetful, belligerent species – just look at politics – but it means we also have a greater capacity to learn. A spider will never learn how to weave a web shaped with the likeness of Andy Warhol, for example. But we can learn to make Campbell’s Soup.

Moral of the story? Don’t stop learning, don’t take it for granted.

Pop Loc

Everything old is new again…

Watch the music video for K-Os’s “Man I Used To Be” lower down on this page. There’s lots of good breakdancing inside, including a two man breakin’ battle. Oh, and it was filmed in Toronto – what more can you want?

After that, take a look at Kottke’s interview with David Bernal, one of the dancers behind the VW Golf GTI commercial featuring a reanimated Gene Kelly poppin’ and lockin’.

No woman no country

Mars and China have one thing in common: they both need women. Thanks to a pro-son cultural bias and China’s one-kid-per-couple law, China’s newest generation has too many males compared to females.

While this may mean a lucrative market for the Japanese makers of the girlfriend lap pillow, the implications of the one-child rule are far more ominous for the Chinese. With no women to keep them in check, they’ll grow up to be lonely, irritable young men with too much spare time on their hands – a recipe for a rebellion.

It is a scientifically provable theory, said political scientist Valerie Hudson of Brigham Young University. And it’s backed up by what any high school graduate can recall: “When guys got together, did they sometimes do stupider and more reckless things than when they were alone?” she asked.

The crucial factor is the effect of bachelorhood on behavior. “The reason that’s important is that only when they are married do they begin to have a stake in a system of law and order that will protect their loved ones,” Hudson said.

In a classic case of chaos effect, their government’s own seemingly benign natal-societal policies could mean its political downfall.

Critical Thinking: More money than sense

With the help of BehavioralFinance.net, Slate lists several common pratfalls by even seasoned investors. A prospectus:

The Gambler’s Fallacy: We tend to believe, incorrectly, that if a flipped coin has come up heads three times in a row it is more likely come up tails next time. Similarly, just because a stock or market has gone up or down for a while doesn’t mean it is more likely to go the other way soon.

This is the reason why analysts always write in really fine print on their glossy brochures, “Past performance is not indicative of future results.”

Why are there so many books on playing the financial market? Why are there more types of mutual funds than lottery games? Because frankly no one really knows.

Why does Gordon Pape go on TV urging gullible seniors to remortgage their homes for an extra vacation week in Florida? Because people think he is an expert. Don’t get me wrong, he’s written some well-received books and made a bit of money in the markets, but past performance is not indicative of future results.